Pack Trips (written quickly)

One of my favorite activities during the fall months at the ranch are pack trips!  They are not restful in the physical sense… but my heart and soul craves the time away. 
A pack trip usually starts with Kim and I going shopping at Walmart.  J  It is filled with people asking what we are doing, where we are going and why we have 2 shopping carts filled to the brim with food and supplies.  When we share with them that we are going camping about 7 miles into the wilderness they give us looks of bewilderment.  How in the world do you get all this stuff in the wilderness? We are usually asked at least once.  Horses. 

There is no better way to camp in the wilderness except with horses.  They carry just about everything.  So when we share with people our meal menus of fajitas, spaghetti, pizza… they question if we are camping at all. 

But the food isn’t want draws me to the trips.  After a good hike in (since the horses are carrying everything we hike instead of ride) we set up camp and enjoy the first night.  It is the next morning and each morning after that which draws me to pack trips.  Each morning after we make the coffee and set the horses out to graze each of us grabs a mug, a bible and journal and finds a spot in the meadow.  Within 10 minutes we are all stationed around spending time in the word.  With no watch, no way to really know the time (except that the cool morning breeze lets you know it’s not afternoon yet) we sit there for an hour, maybe two or three… no one really knows. 

It is uninterrupted time to spend with the Lord.  Sometimes I sing, other times I just lay there looking up to the sky.  There is always a good amount of time in the Word reading, journaling my thoughts and the scriptures.  To be able to sit out somewhere without music, without noise, without someone interrupting you until you are done.  There is nothing really more to say… you have thought of everything you can think of to be thankful for, prayed for all those you know, read and journal and have been filled up.  These are the times that draw me to the pack trips.

Each day I was more and more aware of how little time I spend in the word and with the Lord.  Each time I was reminded of the sacrifices that Jesus made for our salvation because he loves us.  I was reminded that life is a gift that can be gone in an instant.  I asked the question of what am I doing with that life and had to face the realization that my life is filled with more of the world than of Jesus Christ.  This is something I desire to change!

Trust me, I am not saying that I want to just go and be a hermit somewhere just spending time with Jesus.  I don’t believe that is biblical.  Jesus was in the world, he was around people, he was doing ministry and in the midst of that he was spending time with God alone.  What I think I have come to realize is that 1 – I don’t truly cherish the gift of life.  I don’t thank the Lord each morning for giving me another day to live… and looking for ways to glorify him with that day.  2 – As I stated before, my life is filled more with the world then with Jesus.  I put what I believe are my needs and my wants in front of time with him.  I place the Lord on a schedule rather than just spending time with him.

For example, I was sitting at Starbucks this morning listening to a women’s bible study (eves dropping.  J)  They were talking about doing devotions and spending time in the word.  The leader was talking about how she doesn’t always get to time in the word or if she does is after the laundry and other chores are done, or in the evening when everything is quiet.  I was saddened by the fact that she was sharing with these other ladies that it was okay to skip devotions or to get to them later on.  **Side note, she did encourage them to not make time with the Lord as part of your check list – which I completely agree with** 

Some of you may agree and some may disagree on my emotion towards this.  But in the last few days of spending time in the meadow with the Lord I have realized how much I need him.  How much I need and should make him the highest priority in life.  Even if it means getting up an hour before the house starts to get crazy.  To place him at the end of the day or when I can fit him in doesn’t give God priority.  If I truly think about who he is AND what I am created to do here on earth… it is not the laundry, it is not school or work or even a family.  BUT it is to glorify the Lord, to bring people to salvation… To love the Lord with all my heart, soul and mind.  To love others as myself.  How can I do that, how can I glorify, love Him or others when I don’t even spend time with him or make him the priority of my life.

As the fall begins a new adventure starts

Summer is coming to a close and fall is starting.  My hope was that with the cold weather would come a slowing down of pace.  But I am afraid that is not going to happen. 

What is going to keep me busy?  You might ask.  Well after not attending school since 2006, I have decided to go back. 

As many of you know I LOVE to cook.  Any reason, any excuse to have people over so that I can cook I seem to find.  I love the process of cooking.  But even more then that I love watching people enjoy good food and spend time fellowshiping together.  I know that the Lord has and will continue to use my love for cooking to draw people together.

Sometime this summer an idea came to me.  Why don't I take some cooking classes?  As I looked into it I realized that this is something I could do inbetween work.  So I applied. 

But as I usually do, I had a stress out moment down in California.  I was sitting at my aunts house thinking about how I was going to do this.  Take 2 classes and work full time?!?!?!?!  One of those classes being a 5hr class every Friday.  I decided that I just couldn't do it.

I walked out of my room and was actually heading to leave for home again when my uncle and aunt pulled me aside and shared that they wanted to help me with school.  It was almost as if the Lord was informing me that I am not getting out of this decision that easily.  I smiled, accepted and deep down knew that now I HAD to go... there was NO way out of this one.

So here I am first week of school.  Right now I have 3 classes (2 online ones that I am on the waitlist for.  You have to finish all the first week assignments even as you wait to see if you made the class).  I am sitting at starbucks sipping on an icetea doing homework. 

There is excitement and also some fear in going back to school.  I was never really that good at it.  But this is something that I want to do and I believe the Lord has plans to use this in my life as well.

Soooo...  give me a week or two - but I am sure that I will need some test subjects on new recipies! 

Running Late in California

 
What a day! What a weekend!

A while back Laurie let me know she was flying down to California to spend time with her family. Well, I too am always looking for a reason to head south and spend a little R&R with my family. So I asked if I could fly with her... we booked the tickets and we got here on Friday.

I couldn't have picked a better weekend to go. I don't even think I knew how much I needed a weekend away and with my family.

Each day was different except for 1 thing which I cherish so much. Every morning I would wake up to the smell of a fresh pot of coffee and my Aunt Jody sitting at the table that overlooks the front area of the house. The dining table is in a little sitting nook with four big windows that open up to the front of the house. We always see some sort of animal or bird wandering across the dusty drive. And along with that there is always conversation about the Lord, what he is teaching us, reading in the word and speaking his truth. It is a time that feeds me and is something I miss deeply when I go home. I have grown accustom to our early morning chats while sipping on a cup of coffee, pausing our discussion to look at a hawk teaching her baby how to fly, or a funny little squirrel, a coyote wandering by or maybe someday a bobcat or cougar crossing the way (she has seen many do that here, I am still waiting).
 

This week has been low key and wonderful. I have spent much of it with my sweet grandma, who recently lost her dear husband. I have realized that as she grows older (she is 81 or 82 now) time gets shorter and shorter with her. We spent the second evening together chatting over dinner and wandering through the mall late at night.

Yet today was the entertaining day! :)

I was supposed to go to church with my family this morning but our house (my aunt and cousin - my uncle left early for church) accidentally slept in past our alarms. ALL OF US! Both my Aunt and I woke up in a fog and decided to listen to church online and meet the others for breakfast at the country club. I went back to lay down and my Aunt told me to be ready 10 minutes before 10:00 am. Somehow I heard 10:40 am. Luckily I can get ready REALLY fast!

Breakfast was wonderful and then my cousin and I decided to go to the beach. Off to Venice/Santa Monica beach!


On the way there my cousin, who has lived in LA her whole life, got us lost and it took us about 30+ minutes to get there. We laughed at how many other stories we have in our lives of getting lost and the adventures that have come from it. :)

We rented bikes at a little bike shop in Venice where we had to get them back by 7pm. We took off riding our cruisers’ heading to what we believed was towards Santa Monica.


Also, while riding.  Kelly Jo ended up crashing twice.  Once time some guy wasn't paying attention to where he was going and practically ran into her.  The first time though was all her fault.  She was going between a bush and a fire hydrant. Somehow she ended up brushing the bush, no big deal right... well, it got her just off balance that she ended up crashing.  I was good enough to take a picture, while laughing SO hard!

Somehow the both of us thought that we were heading the right way... about 30 minutes into the ride and half way around the harbor we decided to look at our map. We had headed the opposite way of the beach! Now we had to go all the way back.

 Santa Monica was only supposed to be .07 miles from Venice, where we got the bike. I think that by the time we were done riding we did well over 3 miles! :) Finally we got to the pier. We had a short smoothly break, took a minute out by the beach, looked at the time and realized we have 30 minutes to get back!!!

So for the 2nd time today we raced back to get to the bike shop in time. Luckily we didn't realize how quickly you can get from the two places when you are heading the right direction! :) We got back in plenty of time to give our bikes back.

Whew, an exciting afternoon, now time for some dinner.

We drove over to Santa Monica pier where we parked the car in a lot... as we were driving in the lady made sure we understood that the car garage closed down at 10pm. **hint hint - look at the rest of the day and you will see where this is going** We smiled and said that would be fine... headed in and started walking down the promenade looking for food.


Dinner was wonderful, we enjoyed our time. Talked about what the Lord is teaching us and fellowshipped together. The two groups beside us continue to look over at the two of us and I pray that we were able to encourage their walk or be a witness to them through our talking. Dinner ended and we started to walk away. Lazily I picked up my phone and looked at it. 9:59pm!

Oh no, our car!?!?!?!

And then we starting our run! About a quarter of a mile our car was in the garage that we parked it... the garage where the lady kindly reminded us before we parked that they closed completely at 10pm! We ran until we got there and as we got there the last 2 feet of the garage door was closing.

Both of us sat there laughing nervously. Because although it was funny we weren't sure what we were going to do. I fly out in the morning and we drove my rental car, which I HAVE to return to the airport the other day. We discussed who we knew in the area and what we could do. Then we realized the lady was still down in the garage. So the next few minutes were us flagging her down. Finally we were let in and allowed to get our car to leave.


What an ending to an adventurous day! :)


Let's hope flying home tomorrow doesn't include running late!

To Run or Not to Run?

Answer: To Run

Here we go...

Every couple years a bunch of people at the ranch choose to do a marathon. Back in 2007 I was one of those who chose to do it. Although it was hard, tiring and I was very sore (I have never been very good about training) BUT going to Hawaii afterwards was worth it!

Then in 2009 my brother wanted to run a half marathon – he trained – I did not.  But I ran it and again it was hard, tiring and sore! 

Now it is 2011 soon to be 2012 and I guess I am going to do this again.  I decided to register early with the hopes that it will encourage myself to train.  And yes, I am using Hawaii again as an incentive to run.

The part that I LOVE about marathon training is the time with people.  We always run in groups and spend time in prayer and fellowship with each other.  The Lord ALWAYS teaches me things throughout the training time as well.  And we usually finish up the longer runs during the fall months with a warm cup of soup and bull riding.

I will try to keep you updated on what the Lord is teaching me through this time.

Fleeting breath of time

It is amazing how we can get so wrapped up in a project that needs to get done.  Today was such an example of that in my life at work.

It was one of those days that started out running and is still going... I am hoping to end it sometime tomorrow morning around 1am or so.  :)

I actually started this morning out with a little time: eggs and some time in the Word reading through Hebrews.  It wasn't until I got into my truck to drive to the ranch that it slowly started and ended up snowballing the rest of the day.  I back my car up and felt a bump... as I drove forward and looked back, there it was lying on the driveway, my fresh cup of coffee gone.  I had just run over it - not even getting a sip.

Luckily there was coffee at the directors meeting at the ranch.  But the rest of my day was a snowball of events and I was running behind trying to catch up.  Between meetings, trying to get stuff together for a board meeting, giving tours, answering questions, saying goodbye to full time volunteers, vetting horses my day was pack. 

And in the midst of all that there was people.

Throughout the day I failed to, many times, failed to connect with those people.  Even when I was talking with some of them I was thinking about what I needed to do and how I needed to get out this situation.

As I drove home I was listen to a song from Aaron Ivery.  You may know it... it doesn't really speak directly to where my thoughts are tonight, however it started the process.  The line:  I’ll find a way to get you here          If it takes my fleeting breath
It got me thinking about my day and how much it was run by the tasks I had to complete not run by the people I met.  I think that I am learning to understanding that it is not about the projects... God places people in our path, to encourgae forward, to grow towards the Lord, to build relationship with, to draw towards Christ.

I need to change my outlook.  I need to have an eternal perspective.  It is very easy to get task oriented... and to have a perspective that is on the here and now it is even easier.  But when you have an eternal perspective you understand how much more important is it to spend 15 minutes with a person that needs to be encouranged, rather then fixing a computer problem for a staff member.  Or how much more important is to to hear about family maters, to hear what is going on in someones life, rather then putting together a report for a board meeting.  Talking with someone about the salvation that Christ brings over a horse being vetted.

Don't get me wrong I think those tasks are important.  A lot of those tasks allow and help the ministry that I work in to function.  Yet, I believe I was off balence today. 

I need and am learning how to take those moments.  And not even just that... I took some of those moments but my head and heart wasn't there.  I wasn't thinking and praying and realizing that maybe this is an oportunity to glorify God and to possibly be a part of leading someone to Christ.  Instead my head and heart was in the projects of the day.

If you are reading this I just want to encourage you that there is always going to be more to do, there is always going to be tasks that need to be finished... the house is never going to be cleaned. the grocery shopping is never going to be finished, people are going to need you to finish things for them. 

Yet, don't miss those little moments at the grocery store when you bump into someone and you start a converstaion with them.  You don't know what that person is going through... you don't know if this is an ordained moment from God to speak into their lives. 

Don't forget to take those moments when your kids come up in your busy day and they desire to take time to talk with you, to play with you. 

Don't get so wrapped up in the tasks when someone comes to you with burdens and are not saved.  How much more important is that they find salvation in Christ and eternal life will be changed forever.

I encourage you today, do the task, do your job well... wether that is at the a ranch, as a mom, coffee, being a CEO... do your job well but don't get wrapped up in the tasks of life, the business of life that you miss those moments, you miss those times that are going to impact you kids, or impact other people. Because people are what this world is about and people are who Christ came into this world for to save.

Something to think about.

As those lyrics say: I’ll find a way to get you here          If it takes my fleeting breath

I want to sacrifce my time, my fleeting breath of time, to spend with these people so that they can be encouraged, grow closer and even find salvation in the Lord...

That is the kind of passion I want for people!

Take a deep breath and slow down...

The last few months have been insane. I can't remember a summer in which so much stuff happened at once. Between traveling to LA, Redding, the Oregon Coast, Portland, many other places and events I haven't had one weekend without something going on.

I went over to some friends that I haven't seen in a very long time (at least 2-3 months) tonight. It was lying there outside on the grass; a group of us covered by blankets under the stars, watching the movie "Cars" on the side of the arena wall. It was there that I realized how much I have been living life full speed ahead... almost running around like a chicken that’s head has been cut off. Not a pretty sight, I have seen videos of it, thank you Dwight Johnson. :)

I have loved every adventure that I have been on this summer. Time spent with my family down in LA. Playing volleyball and swimming with the staff down in Redding. I loved my time with Laurie out in the wilderness of the Strawberry Mountains. I have enjoyed bridal showers of friends and even Lashae Bowen's wedding last weekend. The coast has been wonderful, and I am excited to go back in just over a week. Portland with the girls was a blast as well and there has been so much more... each experience has had stories of fun and sometimes funny adventures; memories that I will cherish.

Still, this evening I recognized that I hadn’t actually lived in the moment. I have gone, played, enjoyed while understanding what lies ahead, what will be waiting for me when I get back. It has been times of "rest" mixed with much stress of what I am leaving behind to pile up.

In the last week I have changed some things in my life.  I have been making spending time in the world a priority (something that has slipped in the last few months), I have been running when I feel stressed, eating healthy and getting rest.  Yet, in all of this, it was tonight that it all came together and I finally understood what needs to truly change.

I realized that I need to change my focus. The past months I have had a worldly focus and when I really need to have an eternal focus. I have worried, stressed, believed that without me in the picture things would fall apart. That I needed to fix what was wrong, be the strong leader, finish the project before me... and in all of these things I lost my focus on Christ and placed it upon myself, Crystal Peaks and others things and people.

How foolish of me to truly believe that I am the one that needs to fix something or that without me it will all fall apart. Hasn't this world, people around me and even Crystal Peaks been fine for years (thousands of years in the world’s case) without me involved? And yet in this time I have believed that these things has needed me. The Lord has been revealing to me that it is NOT me in it that allows things to stay together... it is only Him. If I was gone tomorrow, this world, Crystal Peaks, my friends and family would live on without me... things would not just fall apart.  Yet, He allows me to be a part of what He is doing if I choose.  J

I would challenge you as well... what things in your life are you holding on to, not letting go? Maybe you have the belief that if you let go everything would crash down around you? Or maybe there is the fear that if you let go things will be fine... and who will need you then? I have struggled through both of those - and will continue to struggle through them. I know though, that I do not really desire holding on to those things... they bring stress, frustration and honestly when I hold on to them so tightly I often am the one who ends up breaking those things I love most and they still come crashing down around me.

Let go of the control. Empower others around you to grow forward and even past you at times. Allow the Lord to be the one who holds those things together. Do not spend your time in worry...

There is freedom in opening your hands and allowing the Lord to do his work... I am learning this again right now.

²⁵ “Therefore I say to you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink; nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing? ²⁶ Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? ²⁷ Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature?
²⁸ “So why do you worry about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; ²⁹ and yet I say to you that even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. ³⁰ Now if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is, and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will He not much more clothe you, O you of little faith?
³¹ “Therefore do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ ³² For after all these things the Gentiles seek. For your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. ³³ But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. ³⁴ Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble."

Matthew 6:25-34

Take time to rest.  Spend time with the Lord.  Allow you focus to first be on Him and then on the world around you.

Fear and Worry

I learned something about myself today.  Well maybe I didn't learn it... I have know it by the feelings that I get.  Yet, today is the day that I am choosing to recognize it for what it is and dig down deeper.

Every time I have to ask someone a question regarding helping me I get nervous.  And not just a little but you know that nervous that you get when you can feel your stomach turn, your heart starts beating faster and you almost could go throw up.  I get SOOO nervous. 

The question I have is why? 

This is what I have been asking myself for that last half hour or so.

The thing is... it is not just big questions but little ones.  Anything that has to do with me not being able to do it on my own.  If I have to borrow something, if I need help researching a product, if I need advise... the list goes on and on.

I think that this is something that I am going to need to dig into, pray about and seek out what I am fearful of.

Matthew 6:27 - Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?